September brings a lot of talk about suicide prevention. There are campaigns and social media posts, fundraising events and reminders to talk more openly and seek support. This work is important, but the messages can feel very different to someone living with suicide grief.
For some, Suicide Prevention Month might be a time of hope and strength. It can bring up feelings that are difficult for some people to tolerate. Both are worthy of recognition, especially when the language around prevention can feel very personal.
When Prevention Messages Bring Up Grief
When you are mourning, you may come across the topic everywhere you go. It could be a post you see scrolling on social media, a conversation you have at work, or a campaign that catches your eye as you are going about your day.
Sometimes, a message that is intended to help can make you feel uncomfortable instead. It might stir up memories or lead you to ask questions that still don’t have easy answers. That doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong.
Sue is a counselling psychologist and trauma specialist and knows just how complicated the grief of suicide can be. Her PhD research has also explored suicide grief and the role language can play for those experiencing such loss.
The Language Matters Too
It is understandable that September is about getting people to speak out, reach out and get help. These discussions have a place of importance.
But there is another side to this one.
People bereaved by suicide also hear these messages. Some words or phrases may feel uncomfortable, upsetting or just too much for someone already carrying grief.
That is not to say that prevention work should not be done. It’s about understanding that language can touch people in different ways.
We need to have both those conversations.
You Are Allowed to Take a Break
You don’t have to read every post or participate in every campaign during Suicide Prevention Month. If something is overwhelming, stepping back is perfectly fine.
It is helpful for you to:
- Take a break from social media
- Silence topics or accounts that are difficult
- Spend time with someone you trust
- Pick a quiet place
- Do something familiar, comfortable
- Talk to somebody who understands what you’re going through.
These are small choices, but they can make a difficult month a little easier.
Your Grief Deserves Space Too
It’s September. You don’t have to share your story. You don’t have to explain how you feel, join a campaign or get involved in a conversation until you’re ready.
You can be passionate about suicide prevention and still find some of the language hard. You can be involved in the broader movement and also make the choice to protect your own well-being.
There is no right or wrong way to feel during Suicide Prevention Month.
September will be a time for action and conversation for some. Or it may be a month that needs a little more quiet and care for some.
Both are right.
Be Gentle With Yourself This September
If you are living through suicide grief, listen to what you need this month. Give yourself permission to take a step back when things are too much and choose the conversations you feel safe having.
Suicide Prevention Month is important, but so is the wellbeing of those already living with grief. Suicide Grief Support provides specialist, compassionate support for people navigating this complex experience.
If you think that you might benefit from support, you can find out more about counselling and the help that might be available to you at Suicide Grief Support.
This September, remember to look after yourself too.